Play Ball!

Sometimes in life, things can get a bit hectic. Other times, we seem to have a better grip. Either way, both of these are familiar places to anyone who’s lived long enough. You see, life is one of those funny things that, no matter how hard we try, we won’t ever quite master. Why? Because it is an ever-changing thing. You were once a child, now you’re not. You were once an employee, now you’re the boss. You were once married, now you’re single again. You used to weigh 125 lbs, now…

I know the analogy sounds weird, but as life makes its many changes, we can categorize ourselves as one of three balls (and for the immature ones, I literally mean balls!):

1. Pinball

2. Kickball

3. Bowling ball

A pinball is small and helpless. In the midst of its machine, it’s hardly seen through all the colors and lights and not to be heard because of all the bells and whistles. It’s seemingly inconspicuous. A pinball is constantly being knocked around. It has no grounding. Its direction is merely determined by its surroundings. There is nothing concrete about the mission of a pinball. It’s ALL OVER THE PLACE! And because it has no sense of self, it often falls into traps...only to start this vicious cycle of being bounced around...all...over...again. In life, there are times that we are just drifting along. We forget to think for ourselves, do for ourselves, or even simply be ourselves. We find ourselves being knocked around by life’s many tests and reacting however we see fit. We have no real sense of direction, no real rhyme or reason. We are simply existing.

On the other hand, a kickball is a bit easier to notice. It’s typically a stand out color and a larger size, so one can see it. Now, the path of a kickball is determined by many factors. Was it pitched slow and bouncy? Fast? Smooth? These all play a role in how high or far the ball will go. The kickball must often be forced into action by the pitcher or the kicker. Either way, it requires force. Many of us know EXACTLY what we should be doing. There is literally NO question. However, we procrastinate or even act obstinate by simply not doing it at all. Then, something compels us to go where we are supposed to go, do what we already knew we should have done. We know we need to go back to school or forgive that person or lose weight or pay off that credit card. But we chillin’...HARD! Then, something happens to FORCE us to make the change we knew we needed to make in the first place! The job won’t promote you without advanced training. You can’t sleep well because you haven’t forgiven him or her. None of your clothes fit, and you can’t afford a wardrobe overhaul. You want to buy a house, so you have to clean up your credit. You see a kickball requires a swift kick in the you-know-what!

However, a bowling ball is heavy and weighted. It has a clear mission each and every time. A bowling ball has a straight path to travel down and the targets are always clear. A bowling ball can’t leave the lane...even if it drifts into the gutter. And no matter how many pins the balls misses or knocks down, the bowling ball ALWAYS returns. When it comes to life, a bowling ball is the ideal ball to be. God gives us purpose and direction with each waking moment of each waking day. If we stay in tune with Him, we hear, see, and respond more clearly. True, we may not knock down ALL the pins ALL the time. Shoot, sometimes we may not knock down a one! But, at the end of the frame, we always return to the Source, the place where we can be used by the Most High to try it again and again. There will be those times that we are living up to our fullest potential, strike after strike. There will be times we have to reset. There will be times that we find ourselves in a lowly space...the gutter. But God is always there. Regardless of how well we perform, we are trying our best to always be available... to do His will...to allow Him to have His way. Bowling balls don’t always do exactly what they’re intended to do, but they are always on the path and their sights are always set. It is with this effort, this focus, this drive, that we live our best lives. There will be ups and downs. There will be good and bad. There will also be God. So no matter if you’re headed for a strike, a spare, a couple pins, or the gutter...bowl on and Be Blessed! XOXO

Accounts Receivable

Last year, after much influence from Erika and Kristen, I finally read The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz. Listen...this book can get a little deep and even a bit weird, but the agreements themselves will save your life! After chewing on the overload of this short read, I settled on one that would become my focus...Number 2:

Don’t Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

Some of you reading this SAY you don’t care what other people say or what other people think, yet you are QUICK to get angry or offended. Why? Because you take the actions and opinions of others personally. Within the last year and some change, I’ve grown to simply say this, “I don’t have to receive your account as my truth.” Period.If a person makes a choice or a statement that offends you, you’ve taken in personally. What’s the other option? Not to receive what they say or feel as your own truth.

What might this look like on your faith walk? People look at me and say, “How you gone write a blog about God and be in the club?” So for them, God is absent from the club and despises celebration, good drinks, two-stepping, and excellently fried chicken wings. That is their account of God, but it isn’t my truth. Someone might look at you and say, “How you gone say you love your family, but you work overtime every week? One cannot serve 2 masters…” That is their account. They believe that caring for loved ones would have one to pass up an opportunity to pay down bills, save up for a trip, or even simply make ends meet. You don’t have to receive that as your truth. To the women, “How you gone say you love yourself but you wear…(weave, make-up, padded bra, fake lashes, etc.)?” Their account of self-love doesn’t require enhancement, which is fine. But, if you ain’t ‘bout that life, then you don’t have to receive that as your truth. Someone calls you stupid, ugly, fat, broke, childish, petty, retarded, annoying, religious, fake, sometimey, the list goes on and on (and I’ve heard them all, but they are not my truth).

Everyone’s account over our lives does not deserve to be received. We never have to own someone else’s feelings about us, no matter how much that person matters in our lives. We CHOOSE to take it personally. Sometimes this can be positive, like making amends with a loved one and honoring their feelings, even if you don’t fully agree with (receive) their account (see any working marriage for evidence of this...often!). On the other hand, making the choice to receive someone’s opinions, behaviors, or feelings as our truth can also cause us heartache or diminish our esteem. In these cases, we have to be aware and make different choices when instances like this arise again. Why? Because we DON’T HAVE TO receive anyone’s account as our truth...EVER!

Taking into consideration what people say about us, do to us, think about us, or feel toward us should be based upon two things: 1) presentation and 2) purpose. Was the presentation foul or out-of-pocket? Then forget them and the horse they rode in on...not my truth boo...not. my. truth. However, if the presentation was in love and edification, mull it over and take a more introspective approach for yourself. Now, what exactly was the purpose? Was it to shame you? Embarrass you? Try to outshine you? An effort to one up you? If so, dismiss it. If not, and the purpose was to help you improve or to improve the relationship between you and another, again, consider it.

Most of the time, we will start to see that much of what people think, say, do, or feel has a lot less to do with us and bunch more to do with them. So, it’s crazy for us to take it personally in the first place! In the grand scheme of things only one account over our lives matters. You guessed it! God’s. So in that case, we don’t have to own what other people say, feel, do, or think. In Galatians 1:10, The Word outright asks us,” Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings or of God?” I’m gonna sit that right there for you receive...or not...either way...Be Blessed XOXO

The Connect

Last night, a sister-friend was on a quest for a custom prom dress. I didn't have the skills or the time, so I connected her to someone with much talent and garment knowledge. Last week, 2 former students, now graduating Seniors, had specific questions about their future HBCUs. I didn't have the info they needed, so I thumbed through the HBCU Alumni Squad to put them in touch with people who could help. I found myself being a bridge for others to get what they needed, which took me back to a conversation with the Big Homie.

I'm entering an inquisitive spiritual stage. I got lots of questions, most of which people can't answer. However, I sound board a lot off my husband because he's a good and honest listener who will admit when he simply doesn't know. In a particular series of wonders, I told him I've often thought about why it seems that Christians pray so hard to Jesus, almost like they stop there and don't go all the way to God. Like so much emphasis is on Jesus that God seems almost like an after thought. It's not a knock,  just a legitimate wonder. His response was hood and good at the same dang time. He said, "Look at it like this. God is the supplier and Jesus is the connect. You gotta go through the connect to get what you need from the supplier. So people probably just talking to the connect. That's all," and he hit me with a cocked head followed by a finishing shoulder shrug.

Basically, it takes time and commitment to get past the connect and come into direct contact with the supplier. In the meantime, the re-up (replenished supply) comes through the connect. Need more hope? More love?  More faith? It's only through ongoing spiritual maturity we begin to pray and seek God's entirety. Jesus is the reason that's possible. His death and sacrifice took us beyond the veil. He still serves as a bridge between us and the Most High God. It's because of Him that even the least of us can talk to God. The forgiveness that Christ embodies redeems us day after day. I don't know about you, but I'm glad to have a connect like Christ. There's no telling where I'd be without Him. If you're not already, get connected. Stay supplied. Be Blessed XOXO

Make Up Sex

Look at ya'll! Some of ya'll clicked the link just because of the title. Just NASTY! But really, it's a fitting analogy. If you've ever been blessed to have a TRULY loving relationship, you know what make up sex feels like. You know the kind. Some of you are squirming in your seats right now reflecting on a moment in time..FOCUS! 

When you and bae are at it, there's nothing worse. The mood in the house is tense. The conversations are short. The thrill is gone, but the love isn't lost. She said something out of line and you're quite frankly sick of it. He did the SAME thing he ALWAYS does, and you are over it! What happens? The war of words. The cold shoulder. The hits below the belt. The things we can't take back.The silent treatment. The anger, the defensiveness...often followed by overwhelming guilt and embarrassing shame. 

However, because this is a relationship built on TRUE love. something happens over the course of time. Sometimes its within minutes. Other times its within days. But at some point, one of you softens. It could be a text message. A random physical touch or kiss. Or even a soft smile where a frown has lived for so long. 

Well, we all know what happens next. Sometimes you just don't make it...to work, to church, hell to the bed (!) before you consummate your commitment to one another! There are times when the conversation of resolve becomes pillow talk after the fact because ya'll HAD to affirm one another physically!

Afterward? The mood in the house is light and airy. The laughter and flirtatious touches are frequent. Surprise text messages, sweet compliments, gazes across a room full of people, eyes locked, and a non-verbal reminder of the love you have for one another. 

Now that some of  ya'll are feeling all "warm" on the inside, you might be wondering, What's all this have to do with faith? Well, some of us are at odds with God. Our interaction has become infrequent. Our words with Him are short. The mood between you and the Most High is lackadaisical. He didn't bless you how you wanted. He hasn't restored you like you needed. You feel alone and abandoned. And these feelings aren't new, so...you're over it. 

Let me the first to tell you, it's time to make up with God. The truth is that my most spiritually insightful encounters have come from a "falling out" with the Lord. My mom died, my husband angered me, my co-workers attacked me, the money was funny, you name it. I felt like, What's the point in being good or trying to do good when messed up stuff keeps on happening? Other times, it was me. I disobeyed God. I lost my faith, lost my connection, or quite frankly lost my mind! 

Listen...God is faithful! Because of this He knows the error of our human ways. He knows that His love, mercy and favor have us spoiled, so when we get upset, we react. 

However, once we soften. Once we realize how much we need Him, He's right there, ready to receive us as never before. There's something to be said about rekindling a relationship with God. You start to feel consumed by His presence. You find yourself smiling for no reason. You have an inexplicable joy, at times, even in the most paramount situations. Making up with God is making your life better. Making your life better is making your home more peaceful, making your job more bearable, making your vision more clear to live out the life He's fashioned especially for you...his special child. So, no matter how long its been, reach out, make the first move to make up with God and restore your love. Trust me, you won't regret it. Be Blessed XOXO

Equipped and Empowered

Equipped and Empowered

A Letter to Men: Honor Her

Hey Guys, 

Here's the deal. There's a lot of information out here to keep us divided. There's a lot of temptation to keep you interested. There's a lot of life happening at any given time to keep you forgetful, selfish, and simply inconsiderate. This is all a given. No man reading this can deny it. If you can't relate, you are lying or you are God himself. Either way, I ain't buying it!

In case you didn't know, this is National Women's History Month. It doesn't get much publicity, and if you're being honest with yourself, you can guess why. But I'm not here for that. Let's skip the history lesson and get to it. 

Women need you. There are movements that would have us believe we don't, but we do. All of us. Why? Well let's get the obvious out of the way, reproduction. Now that the kids are to bed, we need you for SO many other reasons. We need you to be for US what we fight so hard to be for YOU. This isn't just a romantic thing. Plenty of women can satisfy their sexual itches without you. No disrespect, but this is simply some of our truths. What we can't do is REPLACE you. However, what you can't do is REPLICATE us. Some of you have mothers you've put on the back-burner. Sisters you only call when you're in trouble. Aunties who are only good for cooking and comfort. And let's not get started on the grannies. The ultimate bae to you while you're the typical bad boyfriend to her...loving her in the moment, and then in a flash, just like that, you're gone...to be seen again only when it's convenient for you.

But to those of you who are "involved" with a woman in any capacity. She's your boo. She's your bae. She's your fiance. She's your wife. This is a plea to HONOR HER. I know it's hard. She got a stank attitude for no reason. She talking crazy. She ain't cooked. Laundry sky high. Kids ain't in bed on time. And you? YOU? LOOOOONNGGINNGGG for GOOD loving! Why you gotta honor her when she ain't honoring you?? Not to mention, big booty Judy at work, slick tongue Susan at church, lap dancing Lucious at the strip club, and down for whatever Debra on the block. You got options! Lots and lots of options! Why you gotta honor her again???

I listened to a rap lyric the other day that seriously appalled me. Now to be clear, I listen to trap music. I got faith, I love God, but aye, I'm still hood, so the music draws me. The stories, the good ones, the non-cliche, genuine ones draw me in (shout out to Jeezy for all the Trap or Dies, Big Sean for Blessed and such, Kendrick for his presence, J.Cole for his existence, and Chance the Rapper for his interruption). I'm not gonna write what it said. Why? Because it doesn't serve our purpose. But, it does drive home the point that men are being raised, reared, and revered to disrespect women. If you love a woman, trust a woman, honor a woman...you're soft. 

Here's the question: If you are heterosexual and male, who do you live for? The woman who will love you, honor you, bear your children? Or the other men? Your boys? Who have 5 kids, 3 baby mamas, and see less than half of their check every 2 weeks? Who have a new "bad bad" in the sheets every week, yet their lonely, empty, shallow presence comes with loud, brash, inappropriate banter that brings your mood down every time you're around them? Or the gangsta? The one who got 99 problems...she might not be one but that probation officer is! 

So when it gets tough to honor your sister because she STILL beats you up (your mama said don't hit girls). When it gets hard to honor your mom because her hand is out for money. When it gets hard to honor your female boss because she's busting your balls. When it's hard to honor your daughter because her mouth is writing a check her tail can't cash, so you wanna smack her one good time. And when it gets hard to honor your baby's mother, girlfriend, fiancee, or wife because she's being a woman and life is happening around both of you, remember this: 

1. God is in her. Genesis 1:27

2. She is you and you are her. Genesis 2:21-23

3. You are no greater than her, nor her any greater than you. 1 Corinthians 11:11

4. She is strong. Proverbs 31:25

5. Your unity with her strengthens God's work. Galatians 3:28

6. Your love for her helps you hear God more clearly. 1 Corinthians 14:1

7. Honoring her is a necessity. 1 Peter 3:7

Here's the truth: A man's honoring of women, the women he loves because they loved him into a man or the one he's in love with because she loved him even when he acted like less than one is what sustains him. No man comes to this earth but through the vessel God crafted in a woman. The son of God himself needed a carrier...SHE birthed him. THAT alone is worth honoring. Beyond that? Well beyond that, women are the life source of the world. Yes...we birth children, but we also encourage ambition, nurture dreams, and are the biggest cheerleaders to our sons, brothers, and hubbys. We not only birth life, but we breathe it. That said, we too need to be sustained. We need to be complimented. We need to be uplifted. We need you to recognize that God gifted you with a honey-like sweetness upon your lips, a god-like strength in your arms, and an infinite sized loved in your heart to soothe even the most stressful of our days. Your applause, your encouragement, and your hypeness keep us going! We need you to remind us of why we're here. We need you to love us...even when it's hard. We need you to speak life into us, pray growth upon us, and dream into existence the WE that we've yet to become. Without you, our sons are conflicted, our communities are broken, and our families are incomplete. With you? WITH YOU?? The possibilities are infinite. Honor us and Be Blessed. XOXO

Do you see what I see?

In college, my roommate often accused me of having body image issues. To her, I “had a nice shape” and didn’t need to be concerned with working out or dieting. To me, I needed to maintain a certain size to feel confident. Fast forward 15 years, and I’m sure she’d say I’m not too far removed from who she’s always known me to be. However, I’d only disagree that my “certain size” has increased by two dress sizes...one for each kid!

In all seriousness, I totally get where she was coming from all those years ago. I get it now more than ever because I’ve befriended women who see themselves so much differently than what I see. My sister-in-law stays talking about all that’s wrong with her frame, but I see a petite woman with 2 children and a great body! My co-worker swears by the fact that her hair will never “grow back like it used to be”, but I see a beautiful crown of newly liberated natural curls. My close friend believes she’s the size of Shamu after her baby (who is only 3 months old), but I see a woman who carried her baby like a boss and is doing a great job getting down after his arrival!

So many of us women have skewed images of ourselves. We think we are too fat or too skinny because right now society tells us all to be some version of “thick”. We think we are too tall or too short because the perfect height matters...only to a man’s ego. We want someone else’s hair, someone else’s butt, lips, breasts, and skin-tone. As a gender, we have the hardest time with self-acceptance, self-love, and self-admiration. As a result, we turn our noses up to one another; hate on each other; envy others; or simply shrink in the presence of one another. How do I know? I’ve been here...I’ve been her.

I have definitely had my bouts with insecurity, jealousy, and self-hate. I looked in the mirror and saw someone ugly. I pulled on my clothing and only saw all the parts of my body that were “imperfect”. I compared myself to celebrities and around the way girls. I’ve been there. And I’d be lying if I said that I haven’t found myself taking short trips back there every now and then.

However, it helps to hear my husband compliment me when I’m all dressed up or randomly smack me on the booty while I’m cooking dinner. There’s nothing more rewarding than my sons or my students telling me I’m pretty. And let's admit ladies, it doesn’t hurt for my homegirls to gas me up on a girls’ night out! But the biggest change has come from seeing what God sees.

To the ladies who are reading this: You may not have the fattest booty or the longest tresses. Your skin may have a few divots and wrinkles. You may wear a one-piece and not a bikini. You may cover your smile because of crooked teeth or hang your head because you feel inferior to the others in the room. STOP IT! My granny used to always say, “God don’t make no mess.” And it’s true. The next time you find yourself feeling down about how you look, use the words below as a reminder that God made you and that alone makes you BEAUTIFUL:

1.  You were fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14

2. You were made in God’s image. Genesis 1:27

3. You are more precious than rubies...nothing can compare to you. Proverbs 3:15

4. God is within you. Psalm 46:5

5. You are God's handiwork. Ephesians 2:10

6. You are who you are by God's grace. 1 Corinthians 15:10

7. You are altogether beautiful. Song of Soloman 4:7

8. God made everything beautiful. Ecclesiastes 3:11

9. Your beauty is not in what you wear or how you look, it comes from the God within. 1 Peter 3:3-4

10. When you feel less than beautiful, remember who you are and to whom you belong. Ephesians 2:19-22

This makes me think back a few months. A friend of mine received a most fitting gift that speaks to this post. Her husband bought her a pocket mirror for Valentine’s Day. The mirror was inscribed with this saying: “ See the love I see” so that when she looks in the mirror she can see what he sees...what God sees. THAT’s where our self-perception is perfected. In seeing ourselves for who we are...beautiful women, hand-crafted, tailor-made by the true and living God. Believe you are beautiful. Be Blessed XOXO

Listen...

Two weeks ago marks what should have been the most terrifying experience of my life. It was the earliest of mornings, as we had to arrive at the hospital by 6 AM. My brother came to our home at 5:00 to hang with my son all the way until his hospital pre-op. We dropped my oldest son off to my sister who took him to school and agreed to pick him up all week. En route, my husband got a bit squeamish. I told him to breathe, and thankfully we made it without incident.

We arrived to Surgery Admission to find our cousin standing there, bright eyed and smiling, waiting to simply be there for us. We were then admitted by a long-time family friend. The surgeon came in and gave us a 3 on a 1 to 10 scale of concern and complexity for what he was about to do. They gave my baby an iPad and walked us to a certain point where I could no longer be with him. We blew kisses and exchanged our "I love yous", but eventually, I had to let him go. My eyes welled a bit, but oddly no tears fell. After I watched him roll happily down the hall wearing a teddy bear gown and being easily distracted by the new iPad games, I turned to find my mother-in-law and father-in-law waiting right there with Darnell and I as we got on the elevator. We reached our floor and entered a waiting room that began to fill with siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, and friends...OUR family. 

Our cousin led us in prayer, and within seconds the nurse practitioner came to inform us that the surgery had begun. For some odd reason, I was happy. There was a fleeting fear that subsided quickly as my brother-in-law brought Lamar's donuts, which can take your mind off almost anything. In less than 2 hours, the nurse practitioner came back down to say the surgery was a success and they were "closing him up". Half an hour later, she came with one more report. He was recovering, so we needed to move up to the PICU waiting room. 

No sooner than I was able to enter his room to see my little superhero sprawled out with 1,000 tubes and machines hooked up to him did our cousin, who works at the hospital, come in. She'd been there about 10 minutes when a friend of a friend, also employed by the hospital, came by specifically to pray with my husband and me. As the work day started to come to a close, the waiting room became a revolving door of family and friends until visiting hours ended. 

Micah had a week-long hospital stay with little rest, due in part to discomfort and constant monitoring, yet partly because he was never alone. There were many visitors, day in and day out. There was much kissing and spoiling and many toys and balloons and even more snacks and goodies and love...lots and lots of love. I thought to myself, "This little boy has no idea how much he is loved." Then God whispered to me, "And neither do you."

From the moment we found out about Micah, people cried with us, prayed for us, and extended their help, support, and love. The weeks leading up to the surgery were nothing but texts and calls and water-cooler tidbits of thoughts, prayers, and encouraging words. The day of the surgery our cell phones required constant charging and the hugs seemed endless. In the days since, it hasn't stopped. From surprise visits with dinner and cake and wine (so grateful) to continued check-ups and get-well wishes, it has been amazing to feel God's love through his people. 

I never really knew what it felt like to have a "peace that surpasses all understanding" until the day my son got his superhero heart. And I had never really been open to receiving God's love through so many people during such a touchy time. I'm used to keeping to together, having it together, and not depending on many for much. Micah's surgery actually opened my heart...opened it to receive something that I so freely give...LOVE. So, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all of your thoughts, prayers, well-wishes, hugs, and LOVE. Be Blessed. XOXO

The Good, the bad, and the ugly

When you're around someone long enough, they begin to rub off on you. You find yourself saying things they say, viewing things like them, and even doing things they do. When my husband I first started dating, I didn't watch ESPN at all! Now? I can name about 3/4 of the shows and even make some Top Ten calls while watching live sports! He didn't make the bed in the morning, now it looks like hotel room service has stopped by. But, being completely honest, I have to also admit that I've passed some not so great things to him and him to me.

Now, there are those of us who are head-strong and believe that everything we do and say is all on us. You know....the "can't-nobody-tell-me-nothing" type. People see them as leaders and perceive that they blaze their own paths, which is kiiiiinndda true...and kiiiiinnnda not. The truth is, whether good or bad, EVERYONE is a creature of influence. EVERYONE! Our parents, our partners, our peers, all play a role in what we think, do, and say, no matter how head-strong we may be.

Faith is no different. Sometimes, all it takes, is for us to simply witness someone else remain faithful before we find ourselves influenced to hope, to trust, to believe. We all have our own stuff to deal with, but we don't always have the strongest faith. As I look back over my son lying on that operating table, I thought back to the faith I witnessed my mom have when my sister's lung collapsed. I saw the faith my friend Tamisha's mother had when her teenage daughter was oddly diagnosed with cancer. I recalled the faith of my cousin Brandy as she watched her newborn son come in and out of life, only to be walking around and eating up everything now! Knowing that moms around me had been scared and caught off guard, but were able to find strength in simply trusting God rubbed off on me.

Witnessing people around you endure the toughest of tests, but somehow have the faith to go forth, to trust, to believe...that's  contagious. You've been through some things, and for some of those experiences, you have no idea how you made it. But God. Somebody was watching you. Your faith rubbed off on someone else and gave them the strength to carry on. When the going gets tough, ignite your faith and let it spread like wildfire. Be faithful and Be Blessed XOXO

Pull-up

While Micah was in the hospital, he was on a frequent dose of a diuretic called Lasix to help remove fluid from his heart and lungs. So, the nurses had a diaper on him his entire first night. The following morning, the catheter had been removed, and he was all on his own. Of course he woke up with an urgent need to pee.

Darnell and I escorted him into the restroom, undid the diaper, and let him handle his business. When we went to reapply the diaper, Micah inquired, “Why do I have on a diaper? I’m a big boy.” The nurse just so happened to be within earshot and asked if we’d rather her get him a pull-up instead. We thanked her and thought this would appease the little dude. Even with the most age-appropriate explanation, he walked out of the restroom, sporting his Cars themed pull-up, turned around, looked me dead in my eyeballs and said, “Mama, just so you know this is still a diaper...and I’m still a big boy.”

After laughing hysterically, I thought about how this minor thing was both temporary and necessary. But all he could see was that he had on a pull-up. He thought he was done with that phase of development. He didn’t want to be seen as a kid who needed potty assistance. He had moved past those days. He was on to bigger and better things. It didn't matter to him that he'd just had a successful heart procedure. Despite all that he had endured prior to the pull-up, he could only focus on that...nothing else.

We are often the exact same way. Sometimes, God will bring us through the craziest of storms. However, in the midst, He might have to take us back a few paces. Send us to territory we thought we’d never see again. Reconnect us with people we’d separated from. All in order to fully prepare us for what He has in store. Whether we believe it or not, this too is part of the healing after the storm. The setback is necessary for all that we are to become and all that we are to possess. Sometimes, we can’t appreciate all that God has brought us through because we are too focused on the one thing that we don’t quite get.

Hear me today. Micah needed that pull-up just like we need whatever reversion God has allowed to happen in our lives. Why? I can't say with certainty, but there are plenty of possibilities. God can take us back simply to remind us. He can take us back to cover us or protect us. Sometimes, we have to go back to where we've been to get to where we're going. Sometimes, we have to be placed back into an uncomfortable situation to be prepared to bask in the comfort of God. Sometimes, God does what He wants to do, and we just have to deal with it. Period.

Although we don’t always understand why God would take us backward in order to move us forward, it is all a part of the plan. If God is taking you through a pull-up situation, take a moment to reflect on all you’ve come through. See how far He's brought you? He wouldn't bring you this far to cast you back. So, do what you gotta do; be where you gotta be, so you are prepared to Be Blessed XOXO