Please Don't Judge Me...

I judge people. Sometimes, I know full well I’m coming for them. Other times, it’s unintentional. But I definitely do it. Sometimes out loud. Sometimes simply in my head. I have unwarranted opinions. Sometimes I share them, even when they’re unsolicited. Other times, I think them…HARD…and pray they don’t escape my lips. I judge people. Plain and simple. And what I can’t stand is the person who says with much confidence, “That’s why I don’t judge people.” YES. YOU. DO! Chances are the moment that phrase came out of your mouth, you were in a conversation with a person you felt was being judgmental. So, you threw a little shade with your “that’s why I don’t judge people” statement. Hence, you were judging them for being judgmental!

However, when the Word tells us to judge not, it’s not telling us not to have an opinion. No. What it’s actually saying is don’t decide a person’s fate. Don’t decide that a person is going to heaven or hell based off your beliefs or opinions. This is something that many, many church folk struggle with. There’s so much that has been made up and held fast that they have a hard time shaking the thought that where a person spends their eternal life is NOT a human decision!

Tupac once said, “Only God can judge me,” and he was right! We have a way of spewing fear and hate into the masses as a means of drawing them to God. That’s sooooo counter to the message! We have been taught that if you are gay, you are going to hell. Really? Because a HHUUUGGEE percentage of church folk WERE conceived or DID conceive out of WEDLOCK. Are they too going to hell? If you kill yourself, that’s the ultimate sin because you can’t repent, so you’re going to hell. Really? And we know that becauuusseee…If a murderer can take someone else’s life  and still go on to glory, SURELY a person who felt the weight of the world was too much has the same chance.

Chris Brown's ballad makes this request: "Please don't judge me/and I won't judge you/'cause it could get ugly/before it gets beautiful." THIS is real life, so show some real love (shout out to Mary J.). You see, people often spend so much time worried about what other people are doing that they develop the false sense that they ALSO get to determine where that person will spend life after death. NEWSFLASH! You ain’t got that kind of power dawg! Chill. Let people live. Offer righteous advice. Love them despite disagreeable beliefs. Have your own opinions. But please, (in my Rihanna voice) don’t get it twisted. You have no say in where they are headed so HURSH! (and Be Blessed! XOXO)

Looking Like Yo Daddy!

My oldest son started 3rd grade yesterday of course I snapped a picture. After my proud mama Facebook post, I examined the photo a bit more. I admired his slight smile and how that scar that once caused such grief is now a mark of character, making him look more like a young man than a little boy. I thought to myself, He's a pretty handsome kid. The older he gets, the more he looks like his daddy. 

Everyone who sees my sons and I together thinks they look like me, and truthfully they do. So much so that my husband often threatens to take me on the Maury show! He's even crafted the most amazing dance to perform when the results come in. Yes, I married a complete clown. However, as my the big boy gets older, I see so much of his father in his features, in his mannerisms, in his personality. It's clear that he is most definitely his father's child. 

This is the point we should be trying to get to in our walk with the Lord. The older we get, the more people should see our Daddy in us. Now we often confuse what this looks like, so let's refresh. First and foremost, we were made in His image, so when he made us, we already came here looking kind of like Him! Beyond that, He instructs us on how to live like Him and for Him, but He FULLY understands that we will never be Him. And that's the part that we often forget. We think that looking like God means constantly reminding others how much they don't look like Him. We think that His image is one of condescension and judgement. We think that living like Him requires us to point out every mistake and shame every secret of our brothers and sisters. And, well, quite frankly, that COMPLETELY misses the point. 

As I look back over my own life, I think about how far I've come in my walk with God. I'm still very critical of myself, so going through this spiritual drought, I've been really hard on myself at times. Allowing thoughts like, "God is mad at me, " or "I disappointed Him so much, He's going to get me". Worrying that something tragic will befall me to force me back into His fold in a greater way. And then I am reminded...that's NOT how God operates. That's how WE operate. God is forgiving and loving. Will He chastise us? Yes. Will he condemn us? No. Will he test us? Yes. Will he tempt us? No. Will he nudge us? Yes. Will he force us? No. 

See God is the embodiment of the Fruit. He is patient with us. He loves us. He sees past EVERY SINGLE fault. He loves beyond EACH DARK SECRET. He's God. And the stronger we grow in Him, the longer we walk with Him, the more we look like Him. As we grow in God, people should be able to see our Daddy's patience, His self-control, His righteous resilience, His image... the one in which we were made. Will we be perfect? Ummm...no. As a matter of fact, that's how we'll know. We will love ourselves and others past the pain, through the storm, after the mistakes, despite the secrets, over the guilt, and beyond the shame . That's how they will know we are His children. Be Blessed. XOXO