So I have a ridiculous amount of student loans. They are at a
magnitude that I simply don't believe they'll ever go away, so I plan to ride
them until the wheels fall off. Paying on mine hasn't even started because we
are finalizing paying off my husband's. It's as if we are having to play a
childhood street game with Sallie Mae. Sallie may we ever get out from under
your thumb of debt and live?!?
However, one thing that saves us from suffering from the credit ding of
these tumultuous student loans is the grace of FORBEARANCE! *runs praise lap
around the sanctuary* One of the fruits of the Spirit is forbearance. I had to
do my research to figure out what this meant from a spiritual sense because I
ONLY know it in a student loan sense!
According to Bible Hub, forbearance is the toleration of an
offense. It is long-suffering. So forbearance is endurance, being able to
deal with someone or something doing us wrong over and over again? Why on earth
is this a fruit of the Spirit? I mean seriously, does God intend for us to be
doormats? I don’t get it! I had to keep digging…
Bible Tools did the best job giving me some clarity because I was
worried that God was just going to SMH on this fruit for ya girl! This excerpt
sums up the clearest depiction of forbearance as a fruit of the Spirit:
The idea of forbearance
arises in the Bible under different words. Forbearance could be explained as showing patience, even though a thing is
owed to us. It is holding back or restraining the self from doing something
that is normal to do. It is controlling oneself when provoked or offended. Its
synonyms show us some of the nuances of forbearance: "patience,"
"leniency." Leniency does not mean that one allows something to continue. A more
strict definition is that one does not give the full punishment for something
or the full amount of something. You still exact justice, but it is not as
harsh as it could be.
(Read more at:
http://www.bibletools.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Topical.show/RTD/cgg/ID/1372/Forbearance.htm )
Now I get it. It is kind of like Sallie Mae (now known as Navient
for all my fellow student loan holders). I owe them a crap ton of dollar bills.
However, even though it is owed to them, they are allowing me to not pay for a
time. Even though people owe us certain things like respect and love, there are
times we will forebear it because we understand that they may be having a bad
day, be in a bad space, or just have no other idea of life than to be bad to
others. Sometimes, people deserve to get cussed out. Sometimes my kids have
earned a royal butt whooping. But there are times that we restrain ourselves
from doing that thing which is normal to us. It’s like we are giving someone
else grace, even though they have tried it!
But let's be clear, it doesn’t mean that we are doormats. It doesn’t mean
that we have to sit back and let people do us wrong over and over again. We
still have to practice a level of spiritual intuition that removes us from
toxic people and toxic situations. To have forbearance isn’t to become stuck in
a rut of abuse and wrongdoing. It is however to afford others a level of
patience that brings them into His light by us exhibiting His spirit. It's bearing with others the way that He bears with us. Man...
If you are anything like me, your forbearance could use some work.
I’ve come a long way, but I can still get with someone in a moment’s notice.
Some of us are quick to snap on our kids without remembering that we too were
kids. Some of us go off on our significant other without reservation not
forbearing ANY of their frequent foolishness! Some of us let the lady in line at the
grocery store know straight up if she goes back in that aisle for one more
thing, she’s got another thing coming. Some of us have to let our baby’s mother
have it on the text messages because she’s acting “out of pocket” with the
child support or the visitation. Forbearance requires a level of spiritual
maturity that any one of us lacks on any given day. We need to build up this
muscle in a way that shows others what God’s love and guidance can really do.
Our ability to practice forbearance often is a testament to God’s power in our
lives. Today, I pray that all of us grow in this area. That we pray before we
pounce. That we restrain from our normal and practice God's grace toward the rest of His creation as often as possible. Be Blessed. XOXO
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